Rolling Sea
oh my love
how i have choked on things not said
lying stone-faced and silent
next to you in bed
oh i believe i am
the rolling sea
and you are a sailor
you are a sailor
keep your wits about you if you wanna sail me
keep your wits about you if you wanna sail me
i will be your rolling sea
i will take you fathoms deep
i will put away my dreams
just to be your rolling sea
today i sat and watched the clouds
thinking grey thoughts
with the taste of salt and copper in my mouth
and you were nowhere to be found
you better start to swim, boy
or you're gonna drown
you better start kicking
or you're gonna drown
This song has 3 seeds...
1. Once upon a time, I was not good at talking through my angry feelings with my spouse. Instead of saying, "hey that thing you did made me feel in this way," I would do what we now call Angry Sleeping. I would make myself as curled up and tense as possible, and somehow maintain this throughout eight hours of sleep. How? Possibly feminine mystique but also possibly juvenile obstinacy. It wasn't a very effective way to work through issues, so it has since been retired in favour of Me Saying Things Reasonably, which is currently serving us well. The first two lines of this song are taken from a sketchbook I kept during the era of Angry Sleeping. The rest of the song doesn't really have anything to do with it.
2. In 2013, I took a trip to Halifax with Via Rail's Musicians on Board program. If you haven't heard of it, it's a fantastic program that helps Canadian talent travel around the country in a classy way without breaking the bank. I highly recommend it, I had a wonderful time! While I was there, the phrase "rolling sea" came into my head. I'm not entirely sure why, but in it went and it stayed there, incubating, until it was time to write this song. The rest of the lyrical content is really just 1. and 2. fleshed out.
3. Beethoven! I can't tell you exactly what the mechanism was, but the 2nd movement of Beethoven's 4th piano sonata made me write the piano part.
This is one of those songs that gradually weaved itself together over several years. Some of my best work, I think.